Prince Charmings are Hot!

Sigh.

I'm sitting across from a Production Exec who doesn't really get what I'm trying to do.  They're nice, and they smile a lot, but somehow hidden behind the glint in their right eye I know that their thoughts are elsewhere.

They offer me some coffee, but my stomach is off.  Convincing people to do something outside of their comfort zone has never been my strong point.  I like to inspire, not finagle. 

I start to think that maybe I should hire a Development Exec to take these meetings for me, because I am really awful at selling in the room.

On the page -- no problem.  In person; I waiver.

My mind drifts to all the crap that's been made over the years because someone was excellent at pitching it in the room -- and horrible at executing their vision.

We can't all be James Cameron....

"So," he starts and snaps me out of my gaze, "Why don't we see what happens when you hand us a couple of outlines?"

"Cool." I say and thank him.  I guess I'm not so crappy about explaining what I'm trying to do after all.  Either that, or he's hard pressed to fill up his development slate.

My mind starts to do cartwheels.  I hate that despite the fact that something really good just happened, I'm still second guessing myself.

It's annoying.

And lame.

And dumb.

For a second I have a childhood memory of me riding my pink banana seat bike down the street; and I marvel with excitement because there are rainbow streamers flowing from the handles which I had completely forgotten about!  

"Hey!" he says to me with a weird smile. I'm snapped back into the meeting.  I realize that I'm now standing -- and I have my coat on.

"You ok?" he asks with genuine sincerity.

I nod, and give a faint smile.  "I just have a lot on my mind," I tell him as we walk towards the door.

"Well, try to focus on this for now," he tells me before scurrying down the hall to go do something more pressing.

A moment later I'm walking towards reception.

A moment after that I'm in the elevator with a courier.

A second later I'm on the street.

My head feels a bit dizzy, and I start to think that maybe I am coming down with something.  Things have been fuzzy lately. 

Pale.

Void of their full colour.

As if I'm watching everything through a dirty window and the audio is off.  As if I'm walking around in a muted reflection of what my life is suppose--


"WATCH OUT!" I hear a voice yell as the air is yanked from my throat and I'm jerked backwards.

And just like that -- the colour returns.

I try to catch my breath, but I'm distracted by everything that just happened and the blaring horn of a car that narrowly missed hitting me.

Everyone stares.

"You ok?" he asks, and then tries to straighten my jacket which he used to pluck me from certain death.

"Yes!  Thank you so much.  I must have been daydreaming." I say and realize that I'm shaking.

He's tall.

And handsome.

And married.

I do an awkward smile because I'm not really sure how to act in this moment.  I think he knows I was checking him out -- but I like a good fairy tale; and Prince Charmings are hot.

For now, the audio has returned.  I can now feel everything that I'm suppose to.  I'm alive.

It takes a moment before the crowd disperses.  We do an awkward waive with each other as I walk more conscientiously towards the subway.

And when no one is watching, I say a little thank you to Fate for her ever perfect timing.  For somehow, in the millisecond that it took for me to be yanked back into this world; I've had an epiphany about what needs to be done.  What I'm here to accomplish.

And what it all means.