How can I ever repay you?

"Here, spit in this" I say to Mildred as she coughs up more blood into the clean bowl that I've just brought her.  She coughs for what seems like eons, and when most of the phlegm and blood has been released, she sinks back into the bed of pillows on the floor that we've made for her.  Somehow, the sturdiness of the floor is offering her some comfort.

"You have to take care of her," Mildred says to me as I wipe away some of the blood that was left on her chin.

"I will," I tell her with a smile.

There is so much that I want to say to Mildred.  So much that I need to thank her for.  How can I ever repay her?  If it wasn't for her and Annie finding me, and nursing me, and bringing me along with them -- when they didn't have to -- when it would mean less food for them...

"You're the best person I've ever met," I say to Mildred as tears begin to pool in both eyes.

"Oh, please." She says with a half laugh and a small cough.

"Mildred, how can I ever repay you?  What you and Annie have done for me --" I start, but she raises her hand to shush me.

I wait for a moment watching this beautiful person struggle for air.  I know she has something to say.  I can hear Annie rumbling outside.  The rains stopped a few hours ago, and I think she is looking to see what we can take with us on our next leg.

I take a look at Mildred, a good look.  Her eyes are sunken, but they burn with a fire that wants to live.  A fire that is slowly being clouded by the poison in her body.

I watch as the poison clouds away more and more of the fire in her eyes.  She struggles for another breath -- one that would usually induce a coughing spree, but this time, her body is too frail to cough.  She is drowning.

I don't know whether to leave Mildred and run for Annie -- I'm afraid if I leave she will be all by herself.

And no one should be by themselves when they die.

I decide to stay and grip her hand.

"Thank you, Mildred," I say with a wobbly chin as the tears begin to flow continuously from both eyes.

"Thank you, Mildred.  I can never ever repay you." I say with firm conviction.  Her life matters.  I want her to know that.

She gathers a large breath, and between what seems like a stabbing pain in her chest and throat she manages to let out what is on her mind.

"If we can't help each other, then what is the point?" she says as her eyes go vacant and the fire is completely extinguished.

I let her words hang there in the room for a few moments, before I unclasp her hand and turn to go find Annie.

When I look behind me, Annie is standing there -- processing what just happened.

"Dawn is a few hours away.  We'll bury her in the back, and leave as soon as it's dusk." She says before walking away.

I stand to follow Annie, but she disappears into a bedroom down the hall and closes the door.  I let her mourn in private, hoping that maybe the spirit of Mildred is comforting her.  Praying that Mildred will be able to help us on the rest of our journey.  And grateful, for all that Mildred has given to us while she was here and able to do so.